Today. Yesterday. Tomorrow.

Today I was looking through my camera feed for something to post on Instagram.
Something to document my everyday.
I have resorted to social media for that, unfortunately.
It was then I realised how little photos of J I have in my camera feed as opposed to her little-baby days.

We used to take many selfies. Many a day.
That was a period where I was trying to establish the fact that I'm already a mom.
That I have a little person to care for and nurture, and that it was time to grow up.
Lil' J can't do much then and I wasn't sure how I was supposed to interact with her, so I turned to selfies. Capturing moments. Locking in those baby days.
The milestones.
Her puffy cheeks.
Her little hands.
That cheeky smile.
The tip-toe.

Then she grew a little older and started on more activities at grandma's.
I still took many photos then, to document the learning activities we expose her to, as well as her response to it.

I have no idea when the quantity of photos dwindled.
Perhaps it was when I decided to try to capture moments with my eyes and heart instead of the camera.
Or maybe activities nowadays involved doctor-play everyday. Or perhaps, she can play more independently now so I usually let her be while I busied myself with other things.


Today, I remembered how big she has grown. Her hair is so long now that we can tie a pretty decent pony tail.
I have noticed how much she has grown, and how fast that was, but sometimes, I forget.
I forget that she is only two-and-a-half, so even though most of the days she behaves like a big kid, there are times when she behaves just her age - and not that she was trying to be naughty.
I forget to give her cuddles and kisses some days, amidst the daily grind and
'me-time". (Yes, I do get quite a bit of "me-time" now.)
Sometimes, I even forget *gasp!* that she will continue to grow and not wait for me.


Tomorrow, I may not have more pictures of J in my phone. But I will continue to capture them in my heart.
I will attempt to slow time down, and enjoy every single moment, be it the happy ones or frustrating ones -those are part of her growing up too.
I will give her more hugs and kisses before she grows up and starts feeling awkward about them.

Wait, maybe I'll just do that later.